The Secret Kiss Experiment
by TimelordsAndArmyDoctors
Summary: This is a Sheldon/Penny/Leonard love triangle, but it's a Sheldon/Penny love fic. There a few OOC mistakes, but nothing that affects the plot too much. Hopefully this has worked out okay. Please review, and I hope you like. Complete.
1. The Thoughtless Incident

**Penny**

**I have four friends who are absolute geniuses, who all believe I'm not as smart as them. Well, they may have proved all these weird, scientific things, but I proved a greater marvel than them all: Sheldon Cooper has feelings. **

**It was a Friday night. The boys were playing some video game I didn't understand, so I painted my nails neon pink on the sofa, much to Sheldon's dismay. Raj and Howard yelled at the TV, discussing tactics every so often. Sheldon did very much the same with Lenard, but darted vicious glances at me every few minutes, which I met with a petulant grin at his expense. **

**By ten 'o clock, the game was pretty much over. Lenard sat next to me, on arm place lovingly around my shoulders. Sheldon sat next to Lenard, a little more relaxed now because the nail polish was safely capped, and back in my apartment after he made me take it back there. Howard and Raj however, were deep in conversation. The TV was muted, playing some Star Trek movie or something, and I was just dozing off against Lenard's chest, when I heard my name mentioned in Howard and Raj's conversation. It could've been either one of them, because Raj had already downed three beers. **

"**What?" I asked viciously, snapping awake. **

**Raj looked rather sheepish, as always, but responded accordingly.**

"**Oh, Howard was simply explaining how he would want to do you, instead of Heidi Montag." While I was pleased I was considered hotter than Heidi freakin' Montag, I was rather nauseated by the fact that it was Howard who said it. **

"**Howard, you are one dirty comment away from a kick in the balls," I responded, rather bluntly. Lenard giggled childishly next to me, but I decided to ignore it. **

"**Well, personally, I don't see why it matters. They're both sufficiently attractive but I don't see why anybody would want to argue over it. Neither one of your opinions will change what they look like, so why bother?" Sheldon interjected, rather factually. This made me wonder, it spurred me on to ask Sheldon a question I had never had the courage to ask.**

"**Sheldon, what's your deal?" I inquired, a sort of grin building behind my eyes…I wondered what he would say. **

**Sheldon looked puzzled. "My deal? Depends on what you mean. Explain yourself."**

"**Well," I began. "Have you ever had a girlfriend? Boyfriend? Do you ever see a girl and think 'ooh she's cute'? I've never seen you with anybody, not in three long years."**

**From the expression on his face, it appeared I might have overstepped the mark, but he answered all the same. **

"**I can honestly say that I've never taken any interest in the matter. As a child, I spent my time working with lasers. As a teenager, I went to an all boys boarding school, so nothing there either. In all my life I've never cared, and I still don't."**

**And that was the end of the conversation. Well, he wanted it to be, but I pushed harder.**

"**But you still haven't said. Guys or girls?"**

**Sheldon's expression looked determined and rather angry. "I have never taken an interest in this area of life, but, I see women as optimum mating partners."**

**What the hell is he jabbering about, I thought to myself, confused. Lenard answered my internal question. **

"**That's basically Sheldon's way of saying he's straight," Lenard grinned at a very angry Sheldon. **

"**Sheldon," began Raj. "Why don't you get yourself a…" his sentence trailed off into a high-pitched, rather pained squeal. "A..a..aaa.." he tried again, but it seemed that the alcohol he had consumed was not enough to keep him going. He turned to Howard an whispered in his ear. **

"**No, sorry, dude, we're all out of beer." Howard answered. And with that, Raj, rose slowly, dragging his feet at he ambled to the door. He turned briefly and waved, but opened the door, and slugged out. A few seconds later, Howard said "Bye, Raj." **

**I laughed a little. "Awh, I wish he could talk to women. I'd love to see how he is sober, with a voice." **

**Howard answered my query. "Keep dreaming, sweetness." **

**Eww. **

**At that moment, Howard's cell phone rang with a catchy, polyphonic ring. "Hello?" he said, reluctantly. It must be his mother. His expression changed from half-hearted boredom, to worry and concern. "Who is this? …Oh My God...Okay, uh-huh…Yeah…yeah…okay I'll be right there." He shut his phone and stood up.**

"**What's up?" asked Lenard, concerned. **

**Howard's expression didn't change. "My mom fell down the stairs. That was the ambulance service. I've got to get to the hospital." Howard dashed over to the counter to get his keys. **

**Lenard slid his arm from around my back and stood up. "Man, you can't drive. You've had like four beers. I can drive you if you want." Howard nodded after a few seconds. "Thanks, man."**

**Lenard turned to me sharply. "You don't mind, do you?". I shook my head profusely. **

"**No!" I answered. "Absolutely not. Howard, I hope your mom is okay," I said, my voice full of genuine concern. Howard nodded. **

"**Me too," Sheldon whispered. This was all the concern Howard was going to get, so he nodded once again.**

"**See you later, honey," Lenard whispered, kissing me on the head, and bolting out of the front door followed by Howard.**

**The only two left were Sheldon and I. **

"**Well, it's been fun, but I'm going to turn in," Sheldon announced, starting to stand up.**

"**Wait," I began. "Sit," I commanded. He did so. Now Sheldon and I were alone, I wasn't going to waste any time. I had to find out what he was so afraid of with girls. I was going to find out whether he would respond to a hot blooded female. Why not? Things weren't going well with Lenard. He was so in love with me, but there's a fine line between lovingness and clinginess. He was definitely the latter side of the spectrum.**

"**I propose and experiment," I said, matter-of-factly, moving to sit next to him on the left side of the couch. Sheldon looked rather confused. I could tell he was thinking "scientific experiment". **

"**An experiment? You?! What are we going to do? Set fire to a perfume bottle and see how long it takes for the fumes to kill us?"**

**I shook my head. "Close your eyes, I just want to try something. What you said earlier about girls confused me. You, Sheldon Cooper, are not the man everybody thinks you are. You have feelings."**

**Sheldon looked confused again. "What did I say that may have confused you, Penny? Any number of things I should assume, but what in particular made you propose an experiment?"**

**I sighed. "You said 'women are ideal mating partners.' What about love? Doesn't love matter? Doesn't lust matter? You're human, honey. I'm sure you'd react if you were kissed by a woman."**

"**What?" Sheldon protested, guessing my premise. Before he could reject it, I placed my arms around his neck and pulled him towards me. My lips met his with electricity, his hands moving from his sides to my waist immediately. I closed my eyes. He seemed to hold back a little at first, his lips fairly unresponsive, but soon, I could feel him relaxing, giving in to temptation, animal instinct overpowering him. His tense shoulders loosened up. My breathing became more and more erratic, as did his, goosebumps raising on my arms. **

**I slowly moved my hands down to his broad shoulders, to his waist, and forward to his front. I unconsciously began unbuttoning his shirt. His kiss became harder, more urgent. I heard his voice whispering my name between kisses, short whispers, barely audible through the pulsing sound of my blood rushing in my ears. "Penny," he breathed. "Penny."**

*** * ***

**Sheldon**

**Most situations in my life are in the firm grasp of my control. It isn't often that I have no prepared reaction. And in this particular instance, my first reaction was panic because before I could register what was happening, Penny's lips were pressed to mine, but to my acute surprise, my mind somehow knew the way in which to conduct my body. My left hand flew to her waist, holding her tightly, with the other placed on the small of her back. Her arms were flung around my neck, tightening with every caress of my lips. My heart thumped inside my chest, loud enough in my ears to be the only sound I could hear. I couldn't breathe. Every cell in my body called her name, "Penny…" The word escaped my lips from time to time. My lips moved with hers, her head turning in the opposite direction to mine, like we were somehow connected. My skin flushed with heat, my right hand moving to pull off her shirt as she unbuttoned mine. Her skin was so soft, and her hair smelled like vanilla oil. My heart swelled with something I'd never felt before. I couldn't put my finger on it. All I knew was it made me want to hold her tight, and never ever let her go. **


	2. The Adrenaline Aftermath

Penny

Is it possible to be so in love with somebody and not realise it? Is it possible for all those feelings you denied to yourself that were there all along to burst through the floodgates with a single touch? If I had believed it wasn't before last night, I certainly believed it was now.

I woke up the next morning with the strangest feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was lying on Sheldon's couch, butt naked, with a strong arm wound around my stomach that did not feel like Lenard's. It was then that the events of the previous night came flooding back to me.

_Holy crap on a cracker. _

My eyes snapped open as I realised whose arm it was. I twisted my head around to face the person lying behind me, his face serene with sleep, his lips curved upwards ever so slightly…I wouldn't have noticed if I wasn't in such close proximity, but I was. _I was. _I had never been this close to him in my life.

I discovered somebody last night, somebody so different from the Sheldon Cooper I had known for three years. He was different…I'm not sure how but there was something about him last night, as he ran his hands through my hair, and gently kissed my lips, that I just couldn't place, but couldn't bear to part with.

I glanced up out of the window behind us. The sky was still dim, with telltale droplets of crimson and gold scattered aimlessly across the sky, all of which pointed to the conclusion that the sun was just about to rise. Sheldon's other arm was resting on the arm of the sofa, right behind my head. I twisted my upper half round to glance at his watch. 05:03am, it read. Wow, I thought to myself. I'm never awake this early. Fortunately, Sheldon wouldn't be up for another hour or so, and Lenard doesn't get up until eight…_Lenard._

The last of the sheer adrenaline left over from last night disappeared completely as the pure magnitude of the situation hit me. I was lying naked. In Sheldon's apartment. Which was Lenard's apartment too. I almost couldn't bear to ask myself the question: _where was Lenard?!_

A gentle moan escaped Sheldon's lips by my ear as he woke. "Good morning," he whispered. I couldn't move.

"Sheldon," I whispered, in a low alto voice, ignoring his statement. "Do you remember anything from last night?"

He was silent for a moment. I sensed his eyes were still closed.

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I remember a sufficient amount. I remember playing video games, I remember watching Star Trek, and I remember Howard and Lenard leaving, and Raj's alcoholic disposition wearing off, and then we were alone and…oh yes, I see what you're getting at. Yes, I remember what happened when everybody left, and I must say, I experienced the most peculiar of sensations." He paused for a moment. "Penny, we appear to be naked. May I advise, to avoid developing a common cold, or simply getting a chill, that we get dressed. This blanket seems to be extraordinarily flimsy."

I couldn't help but grin just a little bit. Good old Sheldon, never too far away, always there to make everything feel like it normally does. Weird to somebody else, but the best kind of normal for me. No, I scalded myself from inside my head. I had to get back on track. Where was Lenard? My body was still frozen in tension. Just at that moment, the phone trilled next to us, loud in my ear. My heart stopped beating. My breath caught in my throat. _Breathe, Penny. It's probably just Howard calling from the hospital. Lenard is probably with him. Just relax._

I sat up slowly, reaching for the phone. "Not a word about this to Lenard, Sheldon. I mean it, he can't find out."

Sheldon looked worried. "But I can't keep secrets." I hushed him while I answered the phone.

"Hey, Sheldon? Sorry to call so early, but I only just got out of the hospital…" called a cheerful voice from the other side of the phone. I was half right. It was Lenard. The call wasn't for me, but just hearing his voice made guilt sweep over me like a tidal wave.

It was sweet, kind, sensitive Lenard, someone who would never cheat on me, and somebody I had cheated on. Why had I done that? Genuine unhappiness with my relationship? Attention-seeking? A pathological longing to feel some sort of emotion from Sheldon? Or genuine love for the man? I didn't know. All I did know was every time I looked at the guy who was lying behind me, my heart hopped a little in my chest. I glanced at him at that moment, just for a second, and that hopping feeling became a bungee jump. Love? Lust? Was there a difference? Either way, I was a liar. From the moment I started speaking that next moment, I was a liar. My heart had resumed it's rhythm by now and I forced an equally chirpy voice.

"Hey, Lenard, it's me, Penny. How's Howard's mom?" I said.

He sounded strange when he spoke next.

"It's all okay. She's broken her ankle, but Howard is fast asleep at her beside, and I'm beat." He paused for a second. "Hey, how come you're answering my phone anyway? Where's Sheldon?"

Oh crap. I had to lie to him, directly this time.

"Uhm, he's gone into work early. I stayed over last night because I was bored." I cringed. This was so not believable. I waited for him to see through my transparent lie.

All the same, I glanced at the clock. It was early. Earlier than Sheldon Early. That type of lie was pathetic, but at least there was a tiny hope Lenard would believe me. If we had woken up later than six-fifteen, then we would've had some problems. As for staying over, well, I had done it before, I supposed, but Lenard had been in the apartment. Would be really believe that Sheldon had let me stay over of his own free will?

I was disgusted with myself, planning tactics in my head of how to lie to him. I hated this, fabricating lies and stories just to save my own skin. It made me feel dirty. I know it was for Sheldon aswell, but it was painful.

"Oh," said Lenard. "Okay, well I guess I'll see him later. I've got to go now, but I'll talk to you later, honey. Bye." Then he hung up. He bought it.

I put the phone back in it's cradle, and stood up, leaving the blanket for Sheldon. I scanned the apartment for my bra, only to find it strewn across the rug with my panties lying next to it. I reached over and retrieved them, pulling on my underwear, and clipping on my bra. When I was fully dressed, turned to Sheldon, who still looked anxious.

"I can't lie, Penny. He'll either guess, or I'll crack. I can't do it, Penny." There was a glisten of genuine worry in his eyes. I wasn't sure what to do. I was torn. There was Lenard; the sweet, caring man, for whom I felt a love, a warm comfortable love that related more to the love of a brother or a… I sighed. _A good friend, _I thought. Couldn't hurt him, not ever. But I had done. And that's what hurt the most.

But Sheldon…I didn't know. When I was with him the previous night, I felt something I had never felt before. I didn't even know what it was. But it felt safe. We fit like pieces of a puzzle. It felt _right. _

I pulled Sheldon up by the hand, the blanket wrapped around his hips. I pulled him towards me, and carefully traced the contours of his chest with my little finger. I could feel his eyes on my face. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him lightly on the mouth. I was conflicted. When I kissed him, my heart leapt. But at the same time, my conscience banged it's head against my skull like it was a brick wall. I was hurting myself, and everyone around me, but something drew my towards him, and there was nothing I could do about it. If I wasn't with Lenard, this would've been simple. I would've been able to kiss Sheldon and not feel any regret. But instead, my mind was now addled with it.

Sheldon stood still, rigid at first, as always, but soon his jaw line relaxed and he sank into my kiss. My heart leapt. What was it? I couldn't tell. It felt different to how I had felt with every other guy I had been with. Including Lenard. All I knew was There was something going on in my heart that I had never felt for Lenard. I think it was love. But I couldn't tell. I stepped out of the apartment silently, my mind crazed with confusion. I unlocked the door of my apartment, and slammed it behind me. I threw my shoes in the middle of the room, silent tears suddenly springing from nowhere, and streaking my face. I had betrayed Lenard. In one crazy night where I didn't think, I had unravelled feelings I always knew had been there, but I had tucked away, out of the way, just so I could be with Lenard. And now I had betrayed him.

I had slept with his best friend.

And what's more…I was starting to fall for that friend.


	3. The Betrayal Realisation

(Can I first say before the chapter begins, that I realise I have made some serious OOC mistakes, and I'm sorry! I'll try to make it better in each chapter. I just want you all to know that I'm very new to this, so any feedback is worth it's weight in gold to me, so please keep reviewing, and letting me know how I can improve. And sorry for the stupid misspelling of Leonard's name in previous chapters. And if there are any typos, I'm sorry for that too.)

"What the hell is going on here?" he screamed. His face was contorted with agonising knowledge, with thoughts of despair and pain. How could they?

Penny

I pulled myself together. I showered, brushed my hair, got dressed, put on make up, and faced the day. I wasn't used to being up so early in the morning, so all I could do was think of ways to pass the time. By the time I had come to the conclusion that there was nothing for me to do but sit here and battle with my emotions, it was almost time for me to leave for work.

It was a mercy to be able to do something as routine as my day job. The boys would argued that it's " mundane" and "work-a-day" but I didn't mind it. It paid the bills, and kept me tied down until one of those auditions shot me to fame. Putting on a happy face, taking orders, and serving cheesecake took my mind off the war inside my head. It was safe. It was consistent. It was sanctuary, something I could control in the new world I was forced into now where feelings I shouldn't have had were out of my hands. But that war was still raging. My job that day was my respite.

One side of the battle was for Leonard. He was head-over-heels in love with me, but I felt something different for him than what he felt for me. He felt more like a best friend, someone I could open my heart up to without a care, and it would break his heart when he found out what had happened between Sheldon and me. And he _would _find out. As much as I wanted to keep it from him for ever and ever, I knew the day would come when Sheldon would crack, and I would have to face up to my actions.

That was only part of the equation. The opposition to that side of the war was for Sheldon. I had been trying to fight my feelings for months and months, and no amount of time with Leonard, and trying to put it to the back of my mind would keep it away. I tried mentally chaining it to a cell in my head, but it was a stupid plan. I say chains; for all the effect it had on how I felt, it may well have been cotton. How do you fight your feelings? The simple answer was that you couldn't. I couldn't. And no amount of science would ever be able to contradict that.

In hindsight from what I had done, I genuinely didn't know where my mind was at when I kissed him. I barely knew. I promised myself bluntly at the time that it was purely an experiment to see how he would react to a kiss, if there really was a person in there. That was my story for Sheldon, and it was so convincing to me that I started to believe it was the truth. The real reasons melted to the back of my mind, and was absorbed by my heavily stoned conscience. And that night brought everything out. All those feelings I had tried to tie together and dispose of broke free of their flimsy bindings. I knew I was starting to fall for Sheldon, and there was nothing I could do about it.

So that was my dilemma. Powerful, positive feelings were matched by blistering guilt for what I had done to Leonard. The end of my shift came like a death sentence. It meant that I would have to go home, and home meant thinking about it.

Driving home was not so bad. I had to keep my eyes on the road and think about where to turn next. I applied myself rigidly to this, more rigidly than I usually would driving home on a Saturday evening after working an eight hour shift.

But the hell really began when I reached the apartment. Out in the hallway, I bumped into Sheldon. Literally. I wasn't looking where I was going, Esmee Denters blasting through my earphones. He came out of nowhere, and before I knew it, I had walked right into him, accidentally slamming the bridge of my nose into his lower jaw line, his hands flying to my waist to stop me from falling back down the stairs. My nose throbbed immediately, but it simply blended into the background.

A little "oh" escaped my mouth on impact, but I unconsciously paid as little attention to it as I could've when I looked into his eyes. He was here, and my heart ached for him. His eye twitched ever so slightly. I knew it must be hard for him to keep a secret, and I was certain that he had not spoken to Leonard since last night because of that very reason. My heart thumped, and I was very conscious of his hands where they were. I smiled weakly, as he slowly let go, happy that I hadn't bumped my head, and I wasn't going to keel over.

His face was neutral, staring down at me with a little worry flickering in his eyes.

"Penny!" he gasped.

Confusingly to me, a little worry rapidly turned to a lot as he grabbed my arm, took the keys from my open hand, unlocked the door and hurried me into my apartment. I didn't know why he was doing this until I caught sight of myself in the mirror. Blood was gushing out of my left nostril, down the bottom half of my face, flowing down my lips and dribbling slightly down my top. How had I not realised that? I had been paying so much attention to him, and the war in my head that Leonard was currently losing that I hadn't realised that my bumping into Sheldon so hard that it had made my nose bleed.

He sat me down at the counter, as I brought my hand to my nose to stem the blood flow. He disappeared in the direction of the bathroom for a few seconds, and emerged with tissues and a small bowl of water. He passed me the tissues as I did what I could to stop the bleeding.

After a few minutes, the blood stopped flowing, and I held up a small compact mirror to inspect my inevitably bloody face. Eww, I thought. There was dried blood stained starting at my nose and working their way down my lips, and stopped in a rather thin line at the bottom of my neck, a few dots escaping onto my white shirt and yellow work sweater vest. I reached over to the clean tissues and the water to begin cleaning up my face, but Sheldon caught my hand before I reached them.

"No, let me," he said, quietly.

He stepped slowly around the counter and picked up the tissues, bathing them in lukewarm water, wringing them out and bringing them slowly towards my face. He carefully wiped away the blood from my nose, and worked his way down to my lips. I closed my eyes as he dabbed the tissues against my lips, carefully and taking a little too much time for a dried blood stain. I slowly opened my eyes, and found he was staring at me a little to hard. He looked away immediately, abashed. He turned to resume his work on my mouth, when my impulses took over once again, practically hitting an logical thoughts away as if they were balls in a baseball game.

I stood up off the chair and placed my hands on the sides of his head, my lips meeting his for the first time that day. The familiarity felt good, comfortable. Felt his lips soften on impact of my kiss, his body rigid at first (of course) but for some reason, either he knew it was coming or he was getting better because of all the practice that previous night. His hands were placed on the middle of my back, not too tight, not too loose. _Is her getting better at this, or am I imagining it?_ I didn't answer my own question as we kissed. The war was over; Sheldon won hands down. I knew I loved him with everything I had. Leonard didn't even register at this moment.

Well, that's what I thought, anyway.

"Hey, Penny, I was just wondering…" A voice sounded from the hollow hallway. I heard the person the voice belonged to grab the handle, and open the door, their sentence continuing, and stopping abruptly halfway as they took in what they saw.

"P-Penny?" I drew my lips away from Sheldon's, turned, and realised who has just walked in. It was Leonard.

Pain and betrayal spread across his face. He stood very still.

The war began all over again.

Guilt flooded my heart. No, anything but this.

That look on his face broke my heart a thousand times.

Sheldon's hands fell to his sides as I stepped away from him, a repellent force spreading between us now. When I was with Sheldon, my heart belonged to Sheldon. When I was with Leonard, my heart belonged to Leonard. When I was with them both, my heart belonged to nobody. Instead, it shattered into a million pieces.

Leonard's silence broke with a sudden explosion of emotion.

"What the hell is going on here?" he screamed. His face was contorted with agonising knowledge, with thoughts of despair and pain., and he wore a look that yelled, "how could they?"

"Leonard, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for it to…" I began, but I couldn't finish the sentence, because Leonard was already gone.


	4. The Happily Ever After Hypothesis

Penny

Dishonesty has never been something I condone. I hate it when people lie to me, and I shun anybody who tries to explain why. As far as I am concerned, lying about something huge, something life-changing can break a relationship down to it's very foundations. And that's what made the process of going to find Leonard after he saw what he saw so damn painful. Hypocrisy is painful; lying is unforgivable.

I could barely forgive myself. So what would Leonard do?

***

In the few seconds after Leonard stormed from my apartment, everything slowed down. My heart stopped beating for a few seconds. I slumped onto the arm of the couch, quietly processing what had just happened.

"Penny," Sheldon whispered. I ignored him. For two days now, my head had been spinning with decisions, and unfocussed fear of what my heart would tell me to do. But now everything was painfully sharp, and clear. Yes, I had cheated on my boyfriend. Yes, it was with his best friend. And yes, I had hurt him. _Badly. _.

The inescapable truth of this sank my heart like the titanic, like a force, like gravity, something inevitable. I fought it off weakly as I stood and figured out what to do next.

_You have to find him. Bring Sheldon with you. He'll be able to figure out where he is. You made this mess, Penny. Now you have to clean it up,_

Those last few words were some my dad always repeated to like a sacred mantra whenever I did something bad as a child. _Not as bad as this,_ I thought, bitterly.

I power-walked to the door, grabbed my keys, and I was just about to exit when Sheldon caught me by the wrist. How the hell did you get over here so quickly? I thought, confused, and not just because of that.

"Let go of me, I need to find Leonard," I breathed, my voice suddenly hoarse. Sheldon looked fierce, something I had never seen in him. His eyes screamed a thousand words, pleading with me not to go. _Don't go, I don't want to lose you to him. _He didn't say any of this; he didn't have to. It was all there in his penetrating blue eyes.

"Come with me," I whispered. "Please, I can't do this all alone." My eyes were glistening with tears now, but I swallowed loudly to stop then from coursing down my cheeks, and revealing quite how much this was killing me inside.

Sheldon relaxed his grip on my arm, and glanced down at his shoes. After a second, he looked up, and nodded faintly, following me out of the apartment. We dashed down the stairs, and got into my car. As we drove, I questioned Sheldon as to where he might have gone.

"Think, Sheldon! Please, I need you to think. I don't know where he might've gone? Think back to times where this has happened before. Where did he go last time?"

Sheldon looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Well, there was one instance," he began. I looked at him, beckoning his response. "About a two years ago, he had a little fling with a girl named Hannah. She was a particle physicist, and he thought the world of her. Anyway, one day he visited her at her apartment, only to find her kissing another man." I winced at Sheldon's cold, hard facts, and the thought that Leonard had been through this already. Sheldon didn't seem to notice, and carried on with his account.

"He rushed off, and came to work, which was extremely perplexing because it was his day off. I was not there, but Howard and Raj were out looking for him all evening, only to find him in his office, in the last place they would've checked."

His office, of course. I sighed. Why had I not thought of that?

"So, where is it? You'll have to give me directions, I can't remember where it is."

Sheldon pointed left, and I took a turning that brought me down a street full of skyscrapers.

"Anyway" Sheldon continued. "To add insult to injury, this woman was married to the guy she was making out with, and pregnant with his child. So, it really could be worse for both of you right now."

I could tell this was Sheldon's way of trying to cheer me up, but it definitely was not working.

"Penny…we will find him. It…it will be okay," Sheldon stammered. I appreciated his sentiment, but nothing would be able to shift this feeling of guilt and despair from my heart.

We finally reached the Leonard's workplace racing up the stairs to Leonard's office, directed by Sheldon. When we finally reached it, the door was slightly ajar, and sniffing sounds could be hear from the outside. I made him cry. Guilt weighed heavier on my shoulders than ever, but I shoved it from my mind, screaming at my subconscious to stop being such a baby, and that it was nothing compared to how Leonard was feeling.

Carefully, I pushed the door open enough so I could poke my head around the door. And there he was, sat at his desk, head in hands. I turned my head back to the man behind me.

"Wait here," I whispered to Sheldon, who met my demand with a nod. I turned my head back to the room in which Leonard was sobbing.

"Hey," I said, still whispering. His head shot up immediately. The expression of contorted pain I had seen earlier returned, his cheeks stained with tears. I stepped inside his small office, and shut the door behind me.

"Listen," I began, fighting back my own tears still.

"I am so sorry about what you saw. I didn't mean for you to find out, and I didn't want you to get hurt. It shouldn't have happened but I couldn't help it. I was tired, and we were alone, and I had been fighting my feelings for so long, and there was nothing I could do. But I love you aswell, and I don't know what to do anymore…"

I trailed off at the end of the sentence, my voice coming out all high and squeaky. Fighting the tears was useless. They began streaming down my face from the moment I opened my mouth. In a way I had no right to cry; Leonard was the one who was hurting, so much more than I could be.

His face showed something else now. Not anger, not fear, not the pain that was already there, but confusion.

"Aswell? You mean…you love him? You really love Sheldon?" His voice was filled with longing, willing it not to be true.

I nodded, a whimper escaping my lips. "I'm so sorry."

Leonard looked grave. "Is he here?" I nodded.

"He's right outside. He feels just as bad as I do. Leonard, I'm so sorry…"

Leonard nodded back, weakly. All this silence was killing me.

"I'm sorry I went behind your back, I'm sorry I fell in love with him, I'm sorry I lead you on and didn't tell you sooner," I poured, my eyes still spilling with tears. Leonard just stared at me. The worst part of all this was that he wasn't angry at me. All he showed was the pain I was causing him. No anger. No distain. Just despair.

"Penny, I can't just accept that you don't love me. I'm sorry. Just do one thing for me. Just come here for a sec." I dutifully stepped toward Leonard as he rose from his chair. He placed his hand on my waist, leaned towards me, and kissed me gently on the mouth. After a few seconds, he pulled away expectantly. To my confusion, I found fresh tears in my eyes, his kiss a reminder of the love he felt for me.

"Well?" he croaked. I could see he almost didn't want to hear the answer. I simply shook my head, my eyes closing, my head lowering all by itself.

"Nothing," I whispered. I could hear him wincing at the word. "I'm sorry. I love you, Leonard. But not in the way I love Sheldon. I'm sorry I had to hurt you this way. I…" more tears began to fall, more silently now than my hysterics before. I could barely accept it myself. I didn't want to kiss him, because deep inside, I'd known all along. My heart belonged to Sheldon Cooper. And it was only then I really knew it.

I could barely stand to be there anymore, so I turned to open the door and leave. I found Sheldon standing out in the hallway, a perplexed look on his face.

"How'd he take it?" he asked, gently. I shook my head at him, and taking his hand, I burst into silent sobs, my arms winding around his waist, my heart against his chest. I felt an awkward arm around my shoulders, that soon relaxed as we stood there longer. Eventually, I pulled away, staring up at him. There was something I needed to know from him.

"Sheldon, I have to know something. Please, answer my question when I put it to you. I don't think I could bear you skirting around it. Just tell me, and tell me straight. Sheldon Cooper, do you love me?" I could see his left eye twitching slightly, but it subsided eventually as he worked out his answer. All was silent for what felt like an age.

"I…" he began. I could tell this was difficult. I could tell this was difficult for him. "I have never been in a social relationship of this nature before, so I simply cannot determine the answer to your question by comparison to a previous relationship. However, the feelings I experience while in your presence could be identified with those of a romantic nature." I think he thought he was making me feel better, but his answer just made me cry harder. I lowered my head, and tears blurred my vision. He wasn't telling me he loved me, he was stating information.

But, to my surprise, he backed up his long list of facts with one simple sentence that changed everything.

"Yes, Penny. I love you." My heart raced. He had said it. It was so unlike him, it was the last thing I had ever expected to hear from him, but he had said it.

"I love you too," I whispered, the words barely audibly. I stood on my tiptoes, and kissed him gently, my arms still lose around his waist, but his tight on mine. I knew we would be happy. I knew we wouldn't part. He loved me. _He loved me. _

I wondered what would become of Leonard and I.

We would get over it, and we would move on, and he would find a nice girl, a girl who was right for him, and would care for him, and treat him how he should be treated. But one thought remained with me:

Sheldon Cooper had told me he loved me.

My four friends believe that they are geniuses, but I don't think any of them have ever succeeded in such a risky experiment, one like my secret kiss experiment.

I had proved once and for all something people had marvelled over for years: Sheldon Cooper had a heart.


End file.
